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I Am Who I Am - Are You Really?

I Am Who I Am - Are You Really?

February 02, 2023•3 min read

Do you ever have to explain your behavior? Explain because you know you may have hurt or offended someone? Or because you didn’t handle yourself the way you think/know you “should have” or at least “liked” to have handled yourself?

Today I was working with a sales team and discussing their personal brands—their identities. How to think about who we are authentically and marry that with behaviors that match that brand/identity. And I hear through the crowd, “I am who I am.”

Have these words ever come out of your mouth? They certainly have come out of mine.

So here are the facts:

Studies by neurobiologists, cognitive psychologists, and others indicate that from 40 to 95 percent of human behavior—how we think, what we say, and our overall actions—falls into the habit category. If we select a conservative 50 percent, we are on automatic pilot half the time.

  • Our lives are the sum of all our habits to a large extent - good or bad

  • Habits never truly disappear, they are just overpowered by other habits

We find patterns of behavior that allow us to reach goals. We repeat what works, and when actions are repeated consistently, we form associations between cues and responses.

Here’s the question - do you feel like your behaviors align with who you “truly” are?

I realized along this journey that while I really “am who I am” - there were behaviors that had become behavioral habits that were not serving me, others, or the desired outcome.

For instance, stress! I would stress out when things weren’t as I wanted them to be and that stress would permeate the environment. My team had to suffer through the mood swings of happiness, fun, and stress. And while I got over my stress quickly, they didn’t. I soon realized that my habit of reacting and stressing was hurting both my team and my well-being.

FACT: Cravings are the brain’s motivator. For something to become a habit, our brain must crave it.

The collection of behaviors could be as simple as having coffee when we wake up or as complicated as putting stress on others or even running away from problems. These habits didn’t happen overnight. We adapted them to our lives and psyches until they became second nature. They became automatic and helped us stay efficient because we didn’t even have to think anymore…we just behaved.

There are lots of benefits to habitual behavior because it allows us NOT to think - just be.

What is one habitual behavior that you have to explain? Is it time for you to feel extremely good and aligned when you say, “I am who I am?” What is standing in your way? What behavioral habit can you replace today? And what will you put in its place to represent the true and authentic YOU?

If you’re reading this… I am sure that this is true for you…

“I am…
A learner
Light
Love
Growth
Purpose
Me….

I believe we are ALL that and so much more. And I know that sometimes we get in our own way of being who we are and what we are meant to be in this world!

I crave the habits that make me the best me! How much do you crave the outcome?

Today is that day! Remember, moment by moment, day by day… consistency is key! Consistent behaviors lead to habits!

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